To successfully deliver presents to every child on Earth within a single Christmas eve, Santa Claus would need to travel in the region of half the speed of light – enough to vaporise the flesh and disintegrate the sleighs of mere mortals. He’d therefore appreciate the sheer go-fastness of the roguelite running game that’s blasting out of door #3.
It’s Haste!
James: I regret that I never found time, beyond that Next Fest demo plug, to write about Haste. Partly because the irony of being too slow to celebrate a game about moving fast is so painful that I need a Nurofen just from considering it, but mainly because it’s become one of my comfort games: something I boot up just for a burst of guaranteed amusement. Ten minutes before lunch ends? Why, that’s enough for a bit of Haste. Train held up? Out comes the Steam Deck for some Haste, methinks.
Obviously, it wouldn’t get to that point without being a great time in general. It plays like a cheerful combination of Sonic the Hedgehog and a third-person Tribes: Ascend, the pace of your cutesy on-foot courier determined by launching off hills and building momentum by landing smoothly on the downward slopes ahead. Catch the incline with grace and you’ll keep dashing ahead with a truly delicious sense of velocity; miss the angle (or steer yourself into a tree), and you’ll slow to a sad trundle. Lose your pace entirely and the pursuing, world-eating void (it’s not that cheerful) will catch up, sapping your health and sending the otherwise thumping soundtrack into a distorted churn. A nice touch, if one that makes me feel like a worthless horrible failure.
Much more often, mind, Haste makes me feel like leaning forward in my chair, chasing the high of a flawless breakneck dash through one of its bendy procgen obstacle courses. The mission structure is a bit rouguelikey, but the action is forgiving of mistakes, and the items you can pick up at the convenient inter-reality shop do a good job of providing helpful benefits while encouraging clean sprinting by tying their effects to speed. Developers Landfall – they of Totally Accurate Battlegrounds – have also semi-recently added a multiplayer mode, making for pleasantly brisk races that turn into bullet hell co-op sessions whenever a boss fight breaks out. Good, clean, 100 metres-per-second fun.
Julian: There’s a bubbling energy to Haste that reminds me of a bit in The Simpsons when, for an April Fools prank, Bart shakes up one of Homer’s beers in an industrial paint mixer. As he’s putting the can into the fridge, it’s kicking and shaking in his hands, itching to explode. As a viewer, you’re leaning in, waiting for the moment unsuspecting Homer rips back the ring pull.
From the moment you boot up Haste, there’s a constant low-grade rumble in your gamepad, like it’s come alive, readying itself for what’s to come. That buzz sits in your hands until you start your first race. As you press in the left thumbstick, the rumble builds as Zoe’s run charges. Like a cartoon character, she readies herself; one fist moves forward, one back, her forward leg bends, a spring being pressed tight. She holds for a moment. Exploding forward, arms flung back, the rumble in your pad becomes a roar and all that pent up energy is released.
They’re small touches, but it makes every run cathartic.
Head over to the RPS Advent Calendar 2025 to open another door!